Tweens Used To Just Quietly Shoplift At Sephora

For legal reasons this is fiction.

Have you heard? The tweens are infiltrating Sephora, running amok, wreaking havoc, pumping pumps, squishing tubes, using lipstick as crayons on displays, being messy children. It is not a new phenomenon — children have been causing mayhem in businesses since they’ve been allowed in them.

When I was a children, my brother and I would hide in the circular clothing racks in department stores and grab people’s ankles underneath. I would sprinkle the parmesan jars at Italian restaurants directly into my mouth (read: all over my face and body). I would plunge my grabby little mitts into the floor-level fish tanks at Chinese restaurants and pet the captive meals. Once I put a live crab in my pocket and no one knew until a “What’s that smell” investigation ferreted the crustacean out. (To my surprise the bucket of crabs on the sidewalk in front of a fish market did not mean that they were complimentary.)

Specific protocols were in place if the Yong family went to a restaurant and these were on the table. Namely, these were not to fall into my hands at any cost.

Kids are gonna touch stuff. If you don’t want them touching stuff, put it high out of reach, or just don’t have them in your establishment.

@laurieberrybeautyY’all were literally raised by wild animals😠😠😠 JUST STOP ALREADY. #fyp #drunkelephant #testers #sephora #ulta #sorude #sodisrespectful #whoraisedyou #sephoraemployee #ultaemployee #ivehadit #drunkelephantskincare

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